“My survival alone was a miracle.” Diagnosed in 2002 with a life threatening head and neck cancer, Liam Ryan’s doctors told him he should have never survived.…
What is the rush? Why are we always looking to get to the finish line?
As human beings we are conditioned to get to the end result of something. It’s like we are in a race to get to the finish line, but when we do this we fail to enjoy the moment and what is, what is now, what is happening to us and what we are experiencing in the moment. The joy really is in the journey and most of the time the “finish line” is much different than we perceived it to be. Why do we live this way? It may come from a place where we are living in old beliefs, living in fear, living in lack or so many other places that are not true for us.
In my work with clients I see them push to the end of surgeries treatments, to getting back to work etc. and sometimes this living in the future can impact your health and recovery time. I see it with my clients and I see it in my own experiences as a survivor and I will share one of my experiences with you in hopes that it resonates with you.
Prior to my going into the hospital to have my double mastectomy I took all of the steps to insure I had support for myself and my children while I was in the hospital for a few days. It was an emotional time for me, one of internal struggle about my choices and of separation from my family. I remember coming out of surgery thinking of all of the things I was “missing” despite the fact that I felt like I had an 18 wheeler sitting on my chest. I remember looking down at my chest and seeing this red area just above my breast and toward my upper arm. As the hours went on this red area continued to swell and my concern and anxiety grew. It turned out that I needed emergency surgery because I had a blood clot and I can recall the anxiety penetrating my body. All I wanted to do was get home to my children.
My surgeon had the day off and I had a few scary moments with the covering surgeon who initially told me he would go in and do the surgery, but didn’t know what the outcome would be. Anxiety spewed in me to the nth degree. Just before I went into surgery I expressed my anger and feelings to the covering surgeon and it appeared he himself was having his own stressful day and he assured me he would do his best to help me heal. As a result of the surgery I had to spend an additional few days in the hospital and I was livid with my husband because he was the impetus for having me stay in over the weekend. He wanted me to heal and be in the best place possible to do that, but at the time I couldn’t see that.
Looking back at this particular experience in my journey, it was one of the best things that could have happened to me. It pushed me into fear (not always a bad thing) for a bit of time and forced me to see with a different perspective. It was also then that I reached for a lot of the tools that I had collected on my path toward personal development to put the brakes on in my head, so that when I finally got discharged it taught me the way to self-care, self-love and following doctors’ orders so that I could heal without complication. It was the first time in my life that I didn’t rush, didn’t go against the grain, didn’t rush back to work all of which would have been efforts to please others first. I finally got the message that this was a time for ME FIRST and I have to say it has had a wonderful ripple effect in my life.
Living in anxiety and in the future during an illness can release so many draining chemicals into our bodies and that can only inhibit our healing. Living in the moment, although I will admit, not an easy task, ensures a healthier level of energy to circulate our bodies. Sitting back and taking the time to heal and living in the moment can also create a beautiful space to paint a new picture of where you want your life to go and what you want it to look like.
Why not give it a try? Think about it for a moment…What is the worst possible outcome for you if you lived in the moment? And then, what is the best possible outcome for living in that space? Again, it is not an easy shift, but once you turn that corner, trust me you will never turn back.
Enjoy each day, live life and live in the moment. That could look something like taking a nap and giving yourself the care that you need, being in a dark funky place so that you can figure out your next steps or it can look like a beautiful day where you get up and take action and do what you love. There is no right or wrong answer here, the answer lies with you and how you feel at each given moment in your life. Do what is right for you in that moment, give yourself what you need in that moment. Forget about the finish line and just BE where YOU are, it is where you were meant to be.
Reprint Compliments of Gina Costa. Visit Gina on her website.
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Gina is a Certified Professional Coach, Energy Leadership Index Master Practitioner, a Cor.e Wellbeing Dynamics Specialist and a Cor.e Transition Dynamics Specialist. Not only a breast cancer survivor but Gina has also been in the role of a caregiver and an avid fundraiser for women’s cancers.
Dedicated to New Beginnings After Cancer, she is the founder of New Beginnings Coaching Services, LLC which helps women diagnosed with breast cancer cope, step-by-step, with the emotional and physical challenges they experience, so they gain confidence and feel in control of their life again.
Gina received her CPC, ELI-MP, CWDS, and CTDS from The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (i-PEC) and holds a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology from CUNY. She also is an Associate Certified Coach with the International Coaching Federation (ICF).
Please feel free to visit her website New Beginnings with Gina where you can find links to all of her social media sites and access to several free downloads.
You can also contact Gina via email at: firstname.lastname@example.org or call her direct line 917-882-2402.
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